Interview Jinx

After coming back home from an interview, my wife asked 'interview poneengaley enaachu? moonjiya ipdi thonga potuttu vareeenga'?

"mudhalla oru 3 peru thaan'ma irundhaanga....avangalaala evlo kelvi ketka mudiyumo, avlo kettaanga...Sari mudinju veetukku anuppuvaanga'nu paarthaa, interview nadandhturukum podhey oruthan, innoruthanukku phone'a pottu 'free irundhaa vaada..inga oruthan interview'ku chikki irukkaan'u sonnaan".....avan chonnaan.."naan busy'a irukken da, nee venaa inga anuppi vidu naan paarthukrenu sonnaan..." inga mudinja udaney, anga adutha round'ku anupichu vittanga..., anga oru 4 paer'maa moochu thinara thinara kelvi kettaanga... naanum kettutu pongadaanu vitutten..."

"neenga onuthukkum answer panliyaa"

"illa'ma...Kelvi ketutrukkom podhey oruthan sonnaan..'ivan evlo kelvi kettaalum padhil solraan...ivan romba arivaali'nu ninappu pola'....naanum kelvikku padhil theriyara maadhiriye evlo neram thaan nadikradhu"

The Real 'Winner'

Indians are anguished over the humiliating loss the team faced at the hands of the South Africans....

South Africans might have have asked 'Evlo easy'aa enga team win pannirukke... ungalukku vetkamaa illiyaa?'

If Vadivel had been the captain, 'ennavo oru match win pannanadhukku perusaa win panninaa maadhiri peethikkireenga...ulagathula enga venaalum kettu paarunga...kevalamaa thokkaadha idamum kidayaadhu...thothaa azharadhum kidayaadhu.....oru match win panni pesa vandhuttaanga..(turns over to someone else)... annen neenga enga team'oda match aadi jaikkanum sonneengalae, varavey illa????'

PM Gounder

Goundamani:Romba naalaikku appuram, indha Cobol Analysis Tool'a paarkarathukaaga oru ilicha vaaya client vandhirukkaan. Adhaan tool'a konjam dhoosu thattittu irukken. Avanukku idha market pannittom'naa konjamaachum revenuews varum
Senthil: Modhalla en sandhegatha theethu vainga'nnen?
Goundamani:Ennada?
Senthil: Annen, Indha Cobol Analysis Tool epdi nay work pannum?
Goundamani :Dei, Ippo thaanda life’la uruppadiya oru kelvi kettirukka? Perikkaa mandayaa! Initialaa odudhey idhukku per thaan pre processor, idhu program la irukkara ellaa statement’ayum comment pannirum. Adhukappuram main tool run aagum, yenna appa comment pannaa tool run panradhu easy. Apram adhu program la irukkara ellaa information’ayum kadaasi thuppirum
Senthil: Indha chinna load module’la epdi’nney entire cobol program analyse aagum?

(apdinu solli executable’a delete pannidraan)
(Gounder gives an angry look)
(Gounder gets a fone call from the client)

Client: Hello Inga yaaro Cobol Analysis Tool develop panradhaa sonnaangalae? Yaaru adhu?
(Gounder again stares at Senthil. He runs away)
Goundamani:Yaenga, Ungallukku Cobol Analysis Tool’ey thaan venumaa. Java Analysis tool, IDMS extraction tool ellaam use panna maatteengalaa?????

Panic Ballshaw

Got inspiration for this spoof from the bloody feud between Portugal and Holland.

(Here the main characters are Panic Ballshaw and Mokka Antony. Ballshaw discovers that there is a bomb trigger in referee’s whistle that will spoil his encounter match against Antony’s men. Ballshaw calls for a confrontation with Antony in the pitch before the match. An imaginary dialogue scene between them)
BS-Ballshaw AT-Antony

AT: Enna Panickar, Epdi irukka, ennavo engooda pesanumnu sonniyaamey?
BS: Panickar Illa da, Ballshaw, Panic Ballshaw
AT: Ha…,Ha….,Ha…, Ballshaw, Panic Ballshaw, enna edhaachum udhavi thevayaa, edhuva irundhaalum kelu. yaennaa nee namma coach kurangusaamyoda sishyanaache?
BS: Dei Unakkum ennakkum thaan match. Idhula nee saavanum illa naan saavanum. Un aalunga kaal udaiyanum, illa en aalunga kaal udaiyanum. Appaavi referee illa. Ippo purinju pochu, nee oru kozhainu. Oru Kozhai kooda vilayaaduradhu indha Ballshawku, Panic Ballshawku pidikkaadhu, Mudichudaren, Enni 90 minutesla unga ellaar kaalayum udaichu, goal adichu matcha mudichudaren.
(Kurangusaamy -KS interludes)
KS: Dei nee yaarutta enna pesittirukkanu theriyudha?
BS: Theriyum sir, Vilayaada theriyaadha oruthan ta rules pesittirukken.
AT: Vidunga Kurangusaamy. Payyan vilayaatukku pudhusu. Adhaan puriyaama pesaraan. Thambi Ballshaw, enna sonna 90 minutes la mudichiduviyaaa? 90 seconds la naan unga ellar kaalayum udaikkiren. Enna puriyalayaa? Konjam ingae paar.
(Antony team la irukkura 4 defenders kaallayum irumbu boots irukku)
BS: Kannaa konjam ingae paar
(BS team la irukkura ella 11 players kaallayum irumbu boots)
BS: Dei, Ballsaw da, Panic Ballshaw da. Naan oru kaal odaichaa 100 kaal udaichaa maadhiri. Onnu therinjukko, aandavan ketta teamukku 11 players kuduppan. Aana ellaar kaalayum udaichuduvaan. Nalla teamukku 1 player kuduthaalum avanga kaala udaikkaama match win panna vappaan.